So I have fought against creating a blog for quite some time now, despite the fact that some part of me was fascinated by the possibility of the instant fame associated with and wealth that so often accompanies them. My reservations began right of with the name, "blog". It sounds like an uncomfortable blockage in the nose region to me, or at best a strange culinary treat from East Asia. It certainly doesn't inspire me to write great thoughts, or even semi tawdry half-baked ones. But what is in a name really?? and it seems to be here to stay, so I've moved on. I'm also not so keen on putting my private thoughts out there for public dissemination and dissection. I learned some time ago that many of my ideas make people irate and they yell at me, one of my more less favorite things in life, so opening myself up to that abuse made me less than thrilled. Then I realized that you can only WRITE complaints here, and words don't assault my ears, only the eyes, and I can ERASE them if I don't like them! Such is the power of the Blog Master (which I would take on as my nickname if not for the aforementioned aversion to the adorable word "blog"). Finally I read a friend's new blog (find it here http://marsupialquiche.blogspot.com/ ) and I was moved and impressed over the cliff of writing my own. So here we go, but with a couple facts, I dare say warnings even;
1. I don't do diaries. Not that there's anything wrong with them, you go right ahead, they're healthy and motivating to nearly all 12 year old girls. I will not be telling anyone about the new shoes I bought today or the OH SO CUTE!! color of my baby's poop (I don't have one anyway, but we've ALL had to sit through those stories...). I crave substance and depth, I can't help it, so if I'm going to read about someone's day I want it to mean something more, and I want my writing to mean something as well.
2. I piss people off. I don't try, in fact I hate making people mad, but I seem to have a knack for it with some of the things I say. I love to challenge people's beliefs and their vision of the world, and for the favor to be returned, some people go for that and others react VIOLENTLY. So, if I make you angry, I apologize, please try not to leave mean things on my blog, I'll just erase them (see above), but they will still make me feel bad and that sucks for me. Hopefully you feel guilty now and there won't be a problem haha. Constructive discussion is ALWAYS welcome though, so post away!
3. I'm busy so sometimes there will be nothing new posted on here. Please go outside and do something productive and DO NOT sit by your computer waiting for more material to be posted, I will feel bad that you're waiting and become ineffective in my life and will not write on my blog. You see the obvious cause/effect problem here I hope. In other words, go do something productive or I won't be able to write in my blog, I suggest the gym or a medical mission to the third world, they could use our help. Let me know how both go so I can write something about them here. Many thanks in advance.
4. I'm rarely serious, and yet always am (?). If you get my sense of humor, god bless you. If you don't, I'm sorry, and god bless you. The literal meaning of my shit is sometimes not what I'm going for, look a bit deeper and you might find something worth a second look. One could say this about a couple of other things in life as well.
5. I'm a music fanatic and philosophy junky, so if music, philosophy, and the human condition don't suit you, please go here http://www.rnc.org/. Enjoy!!!
6. If you're still with me you must really like me, and for that reason I really like you. If you're male, 25-40 years of age with a cornfed midwestern or stocky wrestler build I like you even more, please contact me at your earliest convenience.
Lastly, a favorite movie of mine is Six Degrees of Separation, I recommend it to all, and one of the best parts is a monologue by Stockard Channing at the very end after all the crazy events of the movie have unfolded, where she laments the conversion of the events in our lives into anecdotes to be told around the table at parties where they loose the essence of what made them real and the experience becomes cheapened. I was moved by the thought then and I am moved by it now and will attempt to keep the experience tangible and meaningful at all times here and in the rest of my life. Ultimately that's why I'm writing this blog (my but we need to find another name for these things don't you think?!?) Aloha and Namaste!
2 comments:
But baby poop *has* substance and depth! It does! :P
You're very right, I didn't mean to imply that it doesn't, all who have played with baby poop can attest to it's substance and depth. I should not discriminate. The section on baby shit, Britney Spears and Karl Rove will be included near the end of the blog. They need a voice too!!! :P back at ya :)
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