Hello, my name is Sean, and I'm a Socialist.

Found this to be fun, let's see what everyone else is, eh?

You are a Social Liberal (70% permissive) and an... Economic Liberal (16% permissive) You are best described as a: SocialistYou exhibit a very well-developed sense of Right and Wrong and believe in economic fairness. Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid

"Everybody gets a man! Everybody get a man!"

A must read for all you bloggers in the bloggesphere (wipe your nose dear, you've got a dangler....)

Oprah Stuns Audience With Free Man Giveaway

Oh Oprah, how you've changed the Amer-I-Can! landscape and reshaped women of today with your depth of humanity, and pocket book. Speaking of pocket books, mammy needs a new car, please send ASAP.

Quotes

I began collecting quotes a while back, here are a few I like.

Nihilism
At some point every intelligent, self aware mind becomes a nihilist. At that point you either kill yourself or you get over it.

NPR interview with some right wing nut job
"Married liberals have a lower birth rate because they abort their babies."

my friend Michael
"You’re just jealous ‘cause the voices only talk to me"

from the movie "Saved!"
"I know what you’re looking at Mary, and so does Jesus"

my friend Kevin
"There are so many beautiful and wonderful things out there right now. They just don’t necessarily have anything to do with people."

From The Doors of Perception, by Aldous Huxley
"Most island universes are sufficiently like one another to permit of referential understanding or even of mutual empathy or "feeling into." Thus remembering our own bereavements and humiliations, we can condole with others in analogous circumstances, can put ourselves (always, of course, in a slightly Pickwickian sense) in their places. But in certain cases communication between universes is incomplete or even nonexistent. The mind is its own place, and the places inhabited by the insane and the exceptionally gifted are so different from the places where ordinary men and women live, that there is little or no common ground of memory to serve as a basis for understanding or fellow feeling. Words are uttered, but fail to enlighten. The things and events to which the symbols refer belong to mutually exclusive realms of experience."

From the preface to Hegel’s first book
"Nothing is easier than to judge what has substance and quality; to comprehend it is harder; and what is hardest is to combine both functions and produce an account of it."

Nietzsche, Ecce Homo, II 1
"It is a matter of course with me, from instinct. I am too inquisitive, too questionable, too exuberant to stand for any gross answer. God is a gross answer, an indelicacy against us thinkers - at bottom merely a gross prohibition for us: you shall not think!"

Peter Mack
"Spilling your guts is as attractive as it sounds."

William F Buckley Jr.
"I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would affront your intelligence."
"Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive."

Frank Zappa
Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

The West Wing
"You’re demons are shouting down your better angels"

Tanqueray commercial
"It’s no coincidence that the fist letter in Martini is "Mmmmmmmm!!"

Sibil’s psychiatrist
"Tell her it’s perfectly ok to think about killing herself, but could she please just wait until I get there"

Albert Einstein, 1954 "This I Believe" essay
"I sense that it is not the State that has intrinsic value in the machinery of humankind, but rather the creative, feeling individual -- the personality alone that creates the noble and sublime."

Praise be to the Sci-Fi !!

I adore Science Fiction. And if that makes me a big geeky nerd, then so be it. I just finished watching Solaris, which I remember getting terrible reviews at the time of it's release. I finally ended up putting it on my NetFlix list. Amazing. It's beautifully made, wonderfully acted, but more importantly it's Sci-Fi at it's best. The medium allows exploration of ideas beyond the scope of our every day life. Thus it allows us to create a context of hyper reality, illuminating with a brighter light our ideas and beliefs. To place them in a contemporary and "real" context would not allow for a complete examination of the depth of idea and thought, the environment would distract from the essential. We cannot carry these ideas to their complete and absolute end without bending reality and experience. In the medium of Science Fiction (and Fantasy certainly) we can take ideas to the extreme, showing us better how the idea will and can impact our present though. The environment becomes a new character in the story, a new influence on our experience, in a way that other genres cannot. The totality of the idea is created, and from that totality all component ideas can be applied, seen in full light, and realized in our real lives. At it's best science fiction transcends our accepted reality and opens new paths of thought, deepening our understanding and appreciation for the world we live in. See the movie, you won't regret it.

What's in a title?

So I went to the book store with a good friend of mine, and we were deeply amused by a number of titles of books as we walked around, most notably the first on this list. I mean really, can you read that with a straight face?? So, I went and looked at the New York Times Bestseller List to see what other fun titles are floating about out there. Here is a short list, and some thoughts to go with them. Authors names have been excluded to protect them, and piss them off.

LIVING IN GOD'S LOVE - Does it pool up on the floor? Can I just roll about in it? I hope there's no strange odor...

100 PEOPLE WHO ARE SCREWING UP AMERICA - Only 100??? A shame that the author excluded himself....

CONFESSIONS OF A VIDEO VIXEN - This one is too easy. So to speak.

ON BULLSHIT - I have this book, I started to read it, but it was, well....

AMERICA (THE BOOK) - "FUCK YEAH!!"

LANCE ARMSTRONG'S WAR - Is HE the one fighting this thing?!? I knew he was fucking up to something.

THREE NIGHTS IN AUGUST - Hey, what happens in Vegas STAYS in Vegas, damn-it!!

ROOM FULL OF MIRRORS - My roommate's memoir, please pick up a copy, we need to pay rent.

ASSASSINATION VACATION - And you thought your trip to Hawai'i was exciting!

YOU: THE OWNER'S MANUAL - Hell yes, FINALLY! This thing had better tell me about this rash...

NATURAL CURES "THEY" DON'T WANT YOU TO KNOW ABOUT - You actually just have to check this dude out, he even went on the Tammy Faye Show to promote this book. Unfortunately "THEY" are the little voices in his head, and that gout you have won't be cured by smoking basil through your ass while whistling God Save the Queen, sorry!!

YOUR BEST LIFE NOW - "I don't think about the past, Darling, it distracts from the now."

HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU - Well shit.

FRENCH WOMEN DON'T GET FAT - They are demons, obviously. This book is a book about demons.

HOW FULL IS YOUR BUCKET? Wasn't this a song by Sir Mix-A-Lot?? Or maybe it was MC Hammer... I can never remember....

JIM CRAMER'S REAL MONEY - As opposed to PHYLLIS STEPHENSEN'S FAKE MONEY which is BOOOORING!!

THE PERRICONE PROMISE, by Nicholas Perricone - This title beckons to me, like sirens at sea or like chocolate cake at midnight. WHAT IS HE PROMISING?!?! and will my laundry be clean when he's done??

EGYPTOLOGY - This is a children's book, actually. When asked "what's this book called?" most parents sadly respond in broken syllables "e-gip-to-LO-gee", and put it back down. AMAZING that it's made it to the NY Times Bestseller list!

LEONARDO THE TERRIBLE MONSTER - Hey, I hated him in Titanic too, but this is just rude!!

FAIRY DUST AND THE QUEST FOR THE EGG - A touching story about 2 gay men and a lesbian. You can fill in the rest.

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH KANSAS? - If you need this one answered....

RUNNING WITH SCISSORS - A witty, amusing, and yet touching title, by Augusten Burroughs, who is hot. If you are reading this, call me, there's more flattery where that came from.

THE POLITICALLY INCORRECT GUIDE TO ISLAM - I do believe a 12 year old could write this one.

THE UNITED STATES OF WAL-MART - This just makes me cry...

BETWEEN A ROCK & A HARD PLACE - Gay porn on the NY Times Bestseller list?!? We HAVE arrived!!!

WHY DO MEN HAVE NIPPLES? - Come here, I'll show you.

RICH DAD, POOR DAD - The sequel to "Jennifer has Two Daddies". The title "My Daddy has a Boy Toy" was passed over, as was "Sugar Daddy's Boy... and Daughter!!"

WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING - As a gay man, I'm confused.... I expect a lot of things, do they mean my next drink? my next trick? this title is far to vague for my tastes....

THE PILL BOOK - a MUST HAVE!

Island Time

As anyone who has come within ear-shot of me in the last 3 days knows, I just got back from a trip to Hawai'i (yes, it has an ', it gets edited out, for "ease of use" perhaps...) where I had the time of my life and where my brain and heart still reside, my body has unfortunately decided to come back to Seattle. I still feel like I'm there though and am having an interesting time readjusting to life here. I am slowly getting back into the swing of things here, though periodically odd feelings hit me, as one did tonight.

On that glorious paradise floating in the middle of the Pacific they have something called "Island Time", which is just the Hawai'ian version of Gay Standard Time, otherwise known as being late. The Gays have brought it to an art form and like to refer to it as being "fashionably late". At times they are so terribly "fashionable" they arrive and *POOF*, they literally become a Prada shoe. It's a sight to see, granted, but a wee bit annoying. Case in point, my birthday party started at 7pm last night, except it actually started at 9 when stunningly fashionable people arrived. But they did come, we had a wonderful time and I haven't a single complaint about the entire evening really, but I did chuckle as those 2 sets of pumps and a stiletto heal walked through my door.

Tonight I had a little piano-social-pot-luck thing to go to. It was lovely, we played for each other, ate a tastey pot-luck dinner and generally tried to pretend that we aren't all big music nerds who want other big music nerds to talk to. It was fun, I left at about 10 pm, and as I was driving home I thought about my friends in Honolulu. I looked at the clock, which said 10:15 and the thought struck me that it was only 7:15 their time, the night was young and the sun barely down. My night was, for all intensive purposes, over, theirs was just getting started. I then remembered what it felt like to be on the other side of the equation, relaxing at 6pm on O'aho and imagining that it was 9pm on the mainland, and how sad it was that those poor suckers' nights were tapering off and mine was just beginning. I would shed a tear and sip my umbrella'd cocktail with a sigh and a smile. I had felt like I had gained 3 hours of my life back, every day, morning and night, despite the fact that 24 hours still filled the day and that mine had merely been shifted a wee bit. I felt it none the less, and was more relaxed while on the island because of it.

Island time is talked about either with a roll of the eyes or outright scorn I found, but I suddenly have a new appreciation for it. It seems to grow out of the fact that somewhere in the mind, whether conscious or sub, the people on Hawai'i realize that the rest of the world is already at work or done and headed to bed, while they are just getting up and showering or sitting down to dinner before catching a movie. They smile a little, sit back, relax and hang loose. We should all be so lucky, and I've decided that I will be that lucky, whether in Seattle, lovely Hawai'i, New York, Paris or the Moon. My Gay Standard Time will now be Island Time, which in the end is not really being late, but is just sitting back and enjoying life for 3 hours more every day, without pressure, without worry, without the rush. I feel more relaxed already, and if it makes me a bit more fashionable, it certainly can't hurt.

Hmmmm....

Somehow things got very heavy on this blog very quickly... I guess I must be in a mood. I will try and come up with some more entertaining and less depressing things soon, I promise.

The State of Help

While there has been plenty written in present days about the ongoing tragedy in the Gulf coast area and New Orleans (not to mention the tragedy going on in Washington DC), and I certainly don't need to add to the row, I found something I wrote a number of months ago that seems apropos. Here it is, with a bit of added material to bring it up to date.

Why do we have such a strange relationship with offering "help"? Self-sufficient is the rule of the day, anything less is seen as weakness of character. Pull yourself up by the boot strings, sink or swim, these ideas are ingrained in the American Way at this point. I have to agree with them to a certain extent, I'm a very independent person who feels like success comes from hard work and dedication. But, when someone really is in need we still many times find excuses not to help, or even worse treat the person like they have done something wrong. We seem to believe that if you do something wrong you will need help, ergo if you need help you've done something wrong. It perhaps works one way, but any Logic 101 class, or a bit of common sense, will tell you it doesn't always work the other way. The problem is we start to ask ourselves "Do we really need to help someone who has done something wrong? It's their own fault that they're in the state they are, they should have been able to take care of themselves." We rationalize our withholding of help and sleep fine at night.

A friend of mine from college killed himself last Spring, and needless to say I was very affected by it. I have had some run-ins with suicide before, but no one I knew as a friend. I had no idea he was battling with some manic depressive issues, was on and off medication, etc.etc., though we were admittedly had fallen out of contact and no longer lived in the same state. He was in Montana when it happened and I was in Seattle, but suddenly everyone out there was saying "I wish I would have known, I would have helped...", and I was certainly thinking the same thing. Is it guilt? Is it knowing it’s too late to offer help that we suddenly DO start to offer it? Would our help been enough in the end? Blame is easy to throw, but the reality is that blame and truth rarely have much in common. In the case of my friend we must chalk it up as tragedy, and hope to do better next time and move on.

Perhaps we can move on to the Gulf. Why does it take so much DEATH for us to offer the help we posses? The truth about the mismanagement of the levee repair, FEMA, the federal government, etc., is coming out and people are outraged, but it's TOO LATE PEOPLE. Who in their right mind let things get to the point they did? The point where an entire major city in the United States of America is under water, completely vacated, and thousands of people are dead. We didn't do what we could to have made that city safe. How many other things out there have we passed over, for monetary reasons or base reasons of pride? I think the list would be long, but let's think more about the personal, individual aspect of the issue. How many people are without health care? How many people are being used as expendable expenses of their employers' instead of valuable assets to their company? How many people suffer alone at home with any number of problems they don't feel that they can talk about because they may be seen as weak, broken, or unable to help themselves? The number makes me ill, and very sad.

My last complaint on the subject is a personal one. I once said to someone I know that I "wanted to help people," to which he responded "Who are you to think you can 'help' anyone? Help yourself, leave other people alone, they don't need you offering your 'help'." He saw offering help as a sign of arrogance.... "I'm so much better than you, let me help you!" I guess I can see the insane logic, but it terrifies me. So my friend is dead and a city is underwater, my last worry is coming off as arrogant, I'd rather try and help. If more people in the world and in white houses truly had an interest in helping instead of worrying about arrogance or lack of self sufficiency I believe the world would be different, perhaps even better.

Random thoughts, read at own risk

Does genius reside in action, or does it lie within the individual whether they use it or not? I feel this is a chicken/egg conundrum, and is ultimately solved by the more important question "If genius goes unused, do we care that it existed in the first place?" So, I go with action as my bar, not that I claim that genius doesn't exist outside of action and within people, but stating that I don't care if it does. It does no good if it's not used. "Does the tree falling in the forest make a sound if no one hears it?" Who cares, no one is there. Alcohol does me no good in the glass, and the genie doesn't help me inside the bottle.
------------------------------------------------

We are crowded with esoteric personal definitions. I'm all for personal expression, but does it help when that expression, by it's very nature and spirit, separates us from those other minds and souls around us?
------------------------------------------------

The gap of knowledge and experiences will always lead people to try to find answers, and the answers that step into that gap will depend heavily on the person's intelligence and environment. The truth of the matter is the majority of people out there do no posses the capacities to get beyond the simple and gross answers, religion being number one on that list. When posed with questions, especially disturbing ones, religion holds comforting, rewarding answers, and truth holds no sway over comfort and reward, especially when truth seems cold and harsh by comparison. But I have to ask, why can't we find answers that are comforting and truthful?
------------------------------------------------

Somewhere in the last 30 years, the Republicans have shifted from the "Do what is right" adult-like party (contra the Democratic "Hey man, you're keeping me down" party) to the "Let me do what I want!" childish party. They act as though they are children on the playground, with playground "rules" and adolescent "logic". Reason and restraint are out, self-serving results are in. Win at all costs, take out those in your way, subvert the truth to get your way. When did the Democratic party become the parent saying "No Billy, you can't do that. I know you want to, but you have to think about more than just yourself...." The Republicans need a spanking, but the liberals keep sending them to the time-out matt...
-------------------------------------------------

Wisdom is a transcendence of power. It makes the need for crass manipulation unnecessary, for through wisdom one better understands the nature of the problem faced, and the solution is an organic one, desired by all and natural to every party.
-------------------------------------------------

Greatness exists in nearly infinite shapes and forms. It is the integrity of the pursuit of greatness that counts most.
-------------------------------------------------

Innocently question, don't knowingly accuse. You'll be amazed by the results.
-------------------------------------------------

Why is it that we have such a problem with someone thinking they are smarter than they are, and so little of a problem with someone who thinks themselves to be too dumb? One is "arrogant", the other is "humble". I'd personally rather have someone be too smart than too dumb, yet we seem to want to stamp out the bright and vocal. We see it in public schools, we see it in public office. Why do we have such an aversion to intelligence?

The Past

I don't like half-way measures, nor abstract ideas. I have decided that resenting the past is rife with both these things. For example I start thinking "What exactly am I resenting? Individual acts? the ideas that led to them? the people around the event?" Far too much ambiguity I think. And how far back do we go? What led to what really? If that one shitty thing hadn't happened in '88, would you have done that other thing in 99? Who can say?!? I start to think, why stop part way down the path? So, I plan to stop with half way measures and ambiguous blame throwing, and start blaming my mother. That's right, my mother. It is concrete, she's sitting right over there, and she is obviously the root of it all (for if she had only been able to push my father off none of this would have happened). This way I no longer have to blame myself or look to the future (it only contains more crap), or generally work to make things better. And now at least I have someone to blame.

On the Radio

"We spend a third of our lives, 30 years in bed!" the radio man said. My friend couldn't get over how that made him feel like so much of his life was being wasted, that it could have been put to such better use than just sleeping. He thought it was a waste, that work could have been done during that time, or he could have been at the gym, or playing golf.

At first I felt the same. So much time asleep, while the rest of the world moved on... I started thinking about what I would do with that time. The gym, work, and golf where far from my top choices frankly. I thought that I might read more, but then realized that that puts me to sleep, so maybe I needed to avoid that instead. Eat maybe? No, I get tired after that too, and I'd have to go to the gym more to make up for the extra food I was gorging myself on. I'd just wear myself out there and have to go to bed. So eating and the gym were out too.

I'd like to say that more productive ideas of how to spend my new found 30 years came to mind, but sex was my next though, of course. "I'd probably like to use the extra time for sex," I thought, and if I couldn't find anyone to help me out, I'd be fine just habitually jerking off. It would be like being 20 again... But even sex makes me want to sleep afterward... So no extra sex.

I realized there was a real problem here; everything that extra time was spent on made me just want to go to bed, and that's just what I'm trying to avoid!! Then a thought struck me: What the hell is wrong with sleep?? For the love of god, it's one of my favorite things!! Right up there with sex, food, massage, and good music. I mean, is there a better night than a fantastic dinner with a hot man, mutual massage leading to mind blowing sex to great music (Aretha? Emmylou Lou? Rachmaninoff?) all capped off with... SLEEP!! Curled up next to him, music fading, good food in the belly, post coital afterglow, ASLEEP.

So I had a new thought then; fuck this radio guy and fuck my friend, I'm going to bed. And I'm jerking off first.

Pregnancy and Individual Manifest Destiny

Back before medically and socially supported abortion (and still today in many third world and backward parts of the world) women were saddled by unwanted pregnancies. So often they didn't even want sex, let alone a baby to go along with it. In the 1800's male birth control (i.e. condoms) really started to help, but until the pill there wasn't much control for the woman, it was entirely up to the man, and refusal of sex on the woman's part was not always an option.

Today it is different, women have control, and, in this country as least, they can hopefully say no to unwanted sex. But strangely this creates a moral problem for our modern society; if a woman has the choice to have sex or to use birth control (or in other words her pregnancies are within her control), than is it her fault if she does get pregnant and does she then deserve to have the child she doesn't want (i.e. "sleep in the bed you made", or "you deserve it you slut!"). Add to it our desire to demonize sex and always make it the "evil" choice over abstinence and the problem compounds. We don't morally agree with abortion because it "kills life" yes, but even more than that we view pregnancies today as "deserved." You were given every opportunity to avoid the pregnancy, and yet you didn't take those opportunities, and you only got what you deserve. If you hadn't gone and gotten pregnant you wouldn't have had to kill it. You're a monster because you chose to be one. The guilt in that is mind numbing.

Is this the modern state of Manifest Destiny? Are we in the age of Individual Manifest Destiny? We seem to believe things happen because we somehow DESERVE them, like judgment or reward is raining down from some heavenly sphere. "I'm rich cause I deserve it. You're not rich? Well you must not deserve it!" Or here's another one for you, "I'm right because I won the presidency, and God wanted me here because I'm right. Would he have elected the wrong guy?? hehe" Demonizing a woman for wanting to have sex, blaming the poor for not deserving to be rich, and the will of the people overpowered by a deity who thinks "W" was the best choice for the job. I sometimes wonder about the world we live in.... or at least the other people living here with me.

One might claim that I'm making excuses for people who HAVE done something wrong and DO deserve what they get. I would not be so bold as to refuse the righteous retribution such people have coming to them, that's why we have a legal system and bright lads and lasses running it. I guess I just don't know a lot of sane people who woke up and said "I think I'll get pregnant today and then kill it!" or "I'm such a great person, I deserve to be rich!" or "I think I'll be President, it worked for my daddy and would look cool on my Heaven Resume! hehe". I think people today DON'T get what they deserve, which is healthy discussion about sex, adequate and fair pay for the work they do, and a swift kick in the ass out the door down Pennsylvania Ave. Let's stop throwing blame and self righteously believing we deserve things and start finding solutions to real problems and helping our fellow humans get everything they truly do deserve.

Keep the experience

So I have fought against creating a blog for quite some time now, despite the fact that some part of me was fascinated by the possibility of the instant fame associated with and wealth that so often accompanies them. My reservations began right of with the name, "blog". It sounds like an uncomfortable blockage in the nose region to me, or at best a strange culinary treat from East Asia. It certainly doesn't inspire me to write great thoughts, or even semi tawdry half-baked ones. But what is in a name really?? and it seems to be here to stay, so I've moved on. I'm also not so keen on putting my private thoughts out there for public dissemination and dissection. I learned some time ago that many of my ideas make people irate and they yell at me, one of my more less favorite things in life, so opening myself up to that abuse made me less than thrilled. Then I realized that you can only WRITE complaints here, and words don't assault my ears, only the eyes, and I can ERASE them if I don't like them! Such is the power of the Blog Master (which I would take on as my nickname if not for the aforementioned aversion to the adorable word "blog"). Finally I read a friend's new blog (find it here http://marsupialquiche.blogspot.com/ ) and I was moved and impressed over the cliff of writing my own. So here we go, but with a couple facts, I dare say warnings even;

1. I don't do diaries. Not that there's anything wrong with them, you go right ahead, they're healthy and motivating to nearly all 12 year old girls. I will not be telling anyone about the new shoes I bought today or the OH SO CUTE!! color of my baby's poop (I don't have one anyway, but we've ALL had to sit through those stories...). I crave substance and depth, I can't help it, so if I'm going to read about someone's day I want it to mean something more, and I want my writing to mean something as well.

2. I piss people off. I don't try, in fact I hate making people mad, but I seem to have a knack for it with some of the things I say. I love to challenge people's beliefs and their vision of the world, and for the favor to be returned, some people go for that and others react VIOLENTLY. So, if I make you angry, I apologize, please try not to leave mean things on my blog, I'll just erase them (see above), but they will still make me feel bad and that sucks for me. Hopefully you feel guilty now and there won't be a problem haha. Constructive discussion is ALWAYS welcome though, so post away!

3. I'm busy so sometimes there will be nothing new posted on here. Please go outside and do something productive and DO NOT sit by your computer waiting for more material to be posted, I will feel bad that you're waiting and become ineffective in my life and will not write on my blog. You see the obvious cause/effect problem here I hope. In other words, go do something productive or I won't be able to write in my blog, I suggest the gym or a medical mission to the third world, they could use our help. Let me know how both go so I can write something about them here. Many thanks in advance.

4. I'm rarely serious, and yet always am (?). If you get my sense of humor, god bless you. If you don't, I'm sorry, and god bless you. The literal meaning of my shit is sometimes not what I'm going for, look a bit deeper and you might find something worth a second look. One could say this about a couple of other things in life as well.

5. I'm a music fanatic and philosophy junky, so if music, philosophy, and the human condition don't suit you, please go here http://www.rnc.org/. Enjoy!!!

6. If you're still with me you must really like me, and for that reason I really like you. If you're male, 25-40 years of age with a cornfed midwestern or stocky wrestler build I like you even more, please contact me at your earliest convenience.

Lastly, a favorite movie of mine is Six Degrees of Separation, I recommend it to all, and one of the best parts is a monologue by Stockard Channing at the very end after all the crazy events of the movie have unfolded, where she laments the conversion of the events in our lives into anecdotes to be told around the table at parties where they loose the essence of what made them real and the experience becomes cheapened. I was moved by the thought then and I am moved by it now and will attempt to keep the experience tangible and meaningful at all times here and in the rest of my life. Ultimately that's why I'm writing this blog (my but we need to find another name for these things don't you think?!?) Aloha and Namaste!