Friday, December 19, 2008

Letter to Barack Obama

It's been quite some time since I posted anything here, and while I don't expect that anyone will see this here, one never knows.

As many of us know, Rick Warren has been invited to speak at Barack Obama's inauguration. At first I did not think too much about this, but the more I think about it the more unhappy I am about this invitation. Mr. Warren does not deserve this honor, in any way shape or form. His type of bigoted speech needs to stop, and it certainly does not need a place on the world stage.

If anyone knows of a good email address for Barack Obama and can send it my way, please do. So far I have not been able to find one, though I will keep looking. And write your own letters. It is time for this type of hate speech directed at gays and lesbians to stop.

-Sean

Dear President-Elect Obama,

I have been a supporter of yours since I first saw you on, of all places, The Daily Show. Never before had I seen someone who could actually go round for round with Jon Stewart without looking like an out of touch idiot. I was extremely impressed by your presence of mind and the content of your words. Each subsequent forum I have heard you speak in has left me with the same admiration and respect, and hope for what can come of your presidency. I have been running very low on hope for some time now as I deal with the struggles of my own life and contemplate the immense struggles facing all humanity on this every shrinking planet, and with your historic rise to the highest office in this land I find a small amount of hope returning. Of this I am deeply grateful, and I thank you.

Recently, and for the first time, I find that hope diminished. Simply, I am a gay man. As I’m sure you have heard from countless other gays and lesbians at this point, we have a problem with some recent events. While it is terrible that it must be pointed out, we live good lives, we work hard (often harder than our straight brothers and sisters since we many times feel the need to prove ourselves more deeply than they do, a fact that you no doubt understand as a black man), we are law abiding, we care for our families and our friends. I am a music teacher devoted to the education of young and old with aspirations of publishing works aimed at deepening everyone’s understanding of the arts and the great benefits that can come from their study. I want to see the world become a better place, for myself and for everyone I know and have yet to know, as I believe you do as well.

Why then does your administration give credence to hateful bigotry of the variety voiced by Rick Warren? While I was certainly shocked by the invitation you extended to Mr. Warren to speak at your inauguration, I am quite a bit more shocked by the reasoning in your defense of that invitation. If I may paraphrase, you have invited him in a spirit of inclusion that is the corner stone of your campaign, that we are a diverse people in America, “noisy and opinionated”, and that we must come together despite disagreements and have a dialogue. I could not agree more, except on one small point.

If Rick Warren thought that black people and other racial minorities should not have the right to marry, you would not support him as you do. The rest of this country would not support him as they do. He would be a marginal figure, preaching a hate that in the eyes of the public went out of style many decades ago. Instead he preaches a hate that IS still in style, despite the valiant efforts of many brave individuals and groups over the past 20 years (though 40 years is more accurate). These voices were forced to make themselves heard as our friends, our family members, and our partners died in horrifying numbers at the hands of AIDS. We may not have been attacked by police and dogs and fire hoses, but we were attacked, and few cared as we died. Something needed to change, and the strides we have made are heartening to a young gay man like myself. To have Mr. Warren given this immense opportunity on this world stage, after all that we have reached and strived for, feels like a slap in the face.

If Rick Warren had had a problem with the fact that you were black, he would not have invited you to his church to speak, nor do I think you would have accepted his invitation, despite your desire to inspire dialogue in this country of the noisy and opinionated. There are some ideas that are not worth entering into dialogue about, at least not in a forum such as the Presidential Inauguration. I do not wish to hear a Neo Nazi speak there, nor a Ku Klux Klan member, nor Rick Warren. While I understand some may find the joining of these three extreme, I and all other gays and lesbians I know do not find it extreme. When you listen to a man dehumanize you, advocate that marriage is about “love and family and procreation”, and realize that he means we cannot possibly have these things, I cannot find his inclusion on that list extreme.

I have made it a point to be inclusive throughout my life, TRULY inclusive. I have had Christian friends who I adored and who in turn pitied and ultimately rejected me because I did not share their faith. I have stood by while Fred Phelps picketed funerals, and other religious “activists” damned me and my loved ones to Hell and worse, taking the advice they ignore to “turn the other cheek”. I have gone out of my way to educate the uneducated and try to break down barriers between myself and those that think there is something wrong with me. I understand and revel in the fact that there are innate qualities in people that cannot be changed, like the color of their skin, their sexual orientation, their gender (physical or otherwise), and we cannot exclude people based on these qualities.

We CAN exclude based on choices people make, and that includes bigoted beliefs like those held by Rick Warren. Just as those that think non-whites to be subhuman, those that think Jews drink the blood of Christian babies, those that believe women incapable of achieving as men do should all be excluded from the public stage, so to should those who believe gays and lesbians to be regrettable, pitiable deviants be excluded. If a discussion is going to be had about why all these views are deplorable and wrong headed, let’s have that discussion, and they should all go approximately the same way; “Each of these groups of people are ignorant and their views cause deep harm to the groups they preach against, and they cannot be taken seriously because….”, and most of us can easily fill in the rest. If you cannot fill in the rest when it comes to gays and lesbians, just talk to us. We can easily tell you why we are human beings deserving of every right you have.

By far the best quote I can find summing up the disappointment and sadness I feel over your invitation of Mr. Warren is from Susie Bright; “The only reason this "invitation" flies at all is because anti-gay and sexually divisive bigotry is still considered palatable, while racial and ethnic bigotry is not.” While I understand the constraints you are under to appease those for whom this type of bigotry is palatable, when will someone in your position finally take the step of saying “Enough is enough”? Either that or please invite a racial bigot to speak as well, so that I know you truly do hold to the ideals of the open forum discussion that you speak of.

Lastly, I have one more statement to make, one that I regret I have never heard from a public figure. There is nothing wrong with being gay. If one cannot hear that statement and nod in total agreement, then one needs to look within themselves more deeply and find the roots of their bigotry. There is nothing wrong with being black, there is nothing wrong with being Jewish, there is nothing wrong with being a woman, and there is nothing wrong with being gay. As a moral and caring person first, and a gay man second, I know for a fact that statement is true. I hope, I hope deeply, that you will believe that fact soon as well.

Thank you for your time and I wish only the best for you and this world moving forward,
Sean Barker
The University of Montana,
Missoula, MT

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