I sat down to write in my little red book last night, the one that has "journal" etched on the front, but that has been used as one very infrequently. Mostly it's filled with random aphorisms, ideas for books, and the occasional ranting, but rarely anything "journal" like. It was about 10:30pm, Hawai'i time, on Sept. 5th. That means it was about 1:30am, Seattle time, on Sept. 6th. I'm in Hawai'i right now, so I'm three hours in the past, depending of course on where the present happens to reside. Since it was the day that it was, and now is, I chose to reside the present in Seattle, which made it my birthday, last night and all day today.
Birthdays and New Years. They may as well be the same thing, don't you think? Each are a measurement of time, divided annually, one marks the year of "It" ("It" is 2006 years old), the other marks the year of "I" ("I" am 28 years old). In the spirit of conservation, I would argue for a combining of the two, saving on greeting cards, but making the birthday paramount I think by answering the question "What year is It?",with "Who the fuck cares?! I'M 28!!"
Conservation in this case sucks though, and in that bad way that binding underwear and bad driving suck, not in the good way that, well... other things suck. Two days (unless you are unfortunate enough to be a Dec. 31st/Jan. 1st baby, to whom I say "couldn't mom have pushed a little earlier or held you in a bit longer??" -sigh- it's a shame....) for reflection, celebration, meditation, inbibation, the -tion of your choice really, are better than one in my book.
Every New Year I think about the year that has passed. All the events, the happenings, the ups, the downs, the side to sides. It's very external, reaching inward. How has the year effected, and affected, me? What will next year be like? Who will I kiss at midnight, will he be cute, and what will that portend for the rest of the new year? You know, the important questions. And everyone else is along for the same ride, it's very communal and global.
Birthdays though... they are different. No one else is celebrating that day for themselves, they are celebrating for you. It's your day, and it's a day to think about yourself and your world. It's about inward looking outward now, about how you effected and affected your year, how you have changed and how you will be changed in the next year. It's a milestone that while others may see it, only you can feel.
Christmas is what it is (we love it but we hate it, you know what I mean), Thanksgiving can be fun, but I don't know why every day can't be full of good food, family, friends, and thanksgiving (and pumpkin pie... /drool) and there isn't much of a milestone quality to it. Valentine's day is great, if you have someone to be great with, otherwise it is a searing needle in the eye reminding you of your loneliness, and Easter is merely a farce.
I prefer birthdays and new years to them all. For both I've been in Hawai'i, by design mostly, and through the kindness of others the design has come to pass, and there's no other place I'd rather be for either. For whatever the hardships of the last year, either It's year or My year, I'm with people I love in a place I love, and it makes me feel like My year can only continue to get better.
Thanks to you both
XOXOXOX
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