1. Religion
Needs to go. We need to stop directing our lives based on myth and superstition, it's causing more problems than it solves. As religion does fulfill a need in some people, they will require a replacement. I propose Chocolate.
2. Lack of Environmental Concern.
Not much point in fixing anything if we're underwater or have no more furry animals to pet. Save the bunnies!!!! Won't anyone think about the bunnies?!?!
3. Expansionist Models
On a finite planet we are operating on infinite principles. From urban sprawl to overpopulation, we need to curb our desire to overrun all that we surveil. While it is true that I sometimes like a man on me, I'd rather not have 35 million of them...
4. Cultural Priorities
- Britney Spears - out
- Rufus Wainwright - in
- WWJD? - out
- WW YOU D? - in
- Monetary Greed - out
- Responsible Living - in
- Ignorant Bliss - out
- Life Long Education - in
- Stream of Consciousness Writing - out
- Lists - in
5. Self-Serving Politics
Government has more power to right wrongs than any other institution. Why then does it seem to cause more problems than it fixes these days? For insight into this perhaps a re-reading of Problem #1 would enlighten....
6. Humanity, Get Over Thyself
We are small and insignificant in the eyes of the universe. There is no cosmic father figure watching over to bail us out. We are all that we have. Perhaps it's time to start treating each other accordingly. Have you kissed a human today?
7. Flying Cars
We were promised them years ago, and yet.... While your at it, make them garbage powered.
8. Over Population
Redundant with #3 maybe, but I thought it bore repeating. There are too many of us. The number is so huge we can't even truly comprehend it any more. BILLIONS of us.... too many. Florida can only handle just so many more old people.
9. Health
We all know what we should be doing to stay healthy, but there are too many forces working against us, including our own laziness. McDonald's needs to go the way of ignorant bliss, though they are perhaps in the end the same thing.
10 HIV
I want sex and love to be fun again, and no longer scary. I want to live a normal life once more, and I want my friends to be able to as well. This thing needs to go....
So there you go, you have your orders. Now CHARGE!!
4 comments:
For Gnomeragon!
haha, Exactly!!
Does this mean I have to give up the Benz?
Not at all Andrew, the Benz can stay (unless you replace it with a flying car), and you don't need to stop blasting "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" as you drive down the road in it either. But you do need to lay off the chimichangas as your waistline is also not an infinitely expandable model.
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